Dearest Frank and Joan,

You had asked me to send you my testimony. I wrote this shortly after the healing.

 The Healing

Laura, one of our pastors, had just asked if I would work with a team of nurses in a First Aid booth at the Creflo Dollar Conference (Church Growth 2002). I thought of it and I said no because a few weeks earlier I had gone to a fair at the venue in the Centre of Excellence and after walking for 10 – 15 minutes I could no longer stand and had to go to the car and wait until everyone else was ready. Just the hour long car ride to the venue would leave me in pain not to mention the hours spent at the conference. By the time I’d get home I would not be able to move. I was in pain all the time and it took great effort to be able to do anything. At that point I cried out to the Lord and said “You said the harvest is plentiful and the labourers are few. Lord I am willing to be a labourer but I cannot do it with the pain. Take away the pain please”.

 In 1994 my family and I were in a car accident and I got a whiplash injury. Within 2 hours of the accident I had neck pains and three months later there came a day when I could not move and had to be hospitalized. A month later I had lower back surgery – Lumbar Laminectomies and discectomy and three months later neck surgery – Cervical Laminectomies, for herniated discs. The surgeries got rid of the extended pains along the arms and legs but the pains to the neck and lower back persisted. Lifting my hands, leaning forward, getting out of bed were painful experiences and I thanked God for each day that I could stand.

 I was a nurse at San Fernando General Hospital and the sick leave continued for 16 months. Everyone kept saying go back to work and I did for one year. During this year, dispite the efforts of the administration to give me ‘light duties’, I went to work each day in more pain than I ever had, came home with more pain and went the next day with even more pain. I took pain killers, muscle relaxants and antidepressants every day to be able to make it. My feet began swelling and the doctor advised against taking the medication all the time since the medications could cause liver and kidney damage and would not be detected until it was too late. I began taking the medications only when absolutely necessary. Emotionally I was not coping well and the sick leave started again and eventually led to me retiring on Medical grounds at age 38 years.

 After retiring from Nursing my family and I started attending San Fernando Open Bible Church. We had been seeking out a church and after attending many different churches we prayed as a family for God to show us where to go and the Lord said “Open Bible”. From the very first day I felt the comfort of the Holy Spirit. In the other churches the sound of the music would set my nerves on edge and increase the pain and I’d have to endure the service but at O.B. the level of the sound was just right. In worship they always included one of the old songs which helped make me feel comfortable. The preaching of the word was rich and pure. So many times at other churches I was subject to people’s opinions but at O.B. I got the unadulterated Word of God which began a work of prospering my soul.

 There were many things I could not do without ‘paying’ for it afterwards with much pain. If I wanted to do something or go to an event, I would have to rest before and after to relieve myself of some of the pain. I became involved in Watchman Prayer Ministry since it was an easy thing to do. I could lie in my bed and pray even if I was in much pain. It brought discipline to my prayer life.

 The year 2002 started off very difficult. The now strained relationship between my husband and I was getting worse. At times I told myself I would be able to cope if I didn’t have husband and children. The pains were getting worse. The pains and numbness in the arms and legs were increasing. Sometimes things would fall from my hands. Walking was getting to be a difficult task. Many days if I’d have to go to the Mall I’d call on the Lord to get me a park so I wouldn’t have far to walk to where I was going and each time without fail the Lord provided the perfect spot. As I’d give thanks for the small mercies of the Lord, I knew I was teaching my little boy, who would always be with me, a valuable lesson of God’s provision. I’d done all I knew to do and decided to wait on the Lord.

 The Lord woke me out of sleep on the night of August, 15^th 2002. I was not dreaming. I was wide awake and deep in my heart was impressed four words: “The Healing is coming”. I started giving God thanks thinking He was going to use the ‘Coral Calcium” I had begun to take two days before, to heal me. I knew it was the Lord speaking to me since at the same time He would not let me rest until I got up and wrote a letter to a friend of ours about God’s Plan of Salvation.

 In the days following my experience with our Lord, I shared that night – time experience with only three friends. The last one I told was on August 25^th. It was a nurse who said to me in the car park after church: “You having a hard time today?” I was in a lot of pain but I told her of the deep feeling in my heart and said “I don’t know when and how and where but I know ‘the healing is coming’. Little did I know it was only hours away.

 That Sunday evening I went to the Watchman’s Prayer, 1 hour before ‘Hour of Power’. We prayered for God to work signs and wonders in the meetings that would be held on the Monday and Tuesday nights by a lady named Joan Gieson, who had worked with Katheryn Khulman and Benny Hinn.

 As I made my way down the stairs to get to the sanctuary for the Hour of Power, I had to hold on to the rail and carefully step down. The pain was great, and each step was a big effort. Our Pastor had said the only reason the lady was being allowed to come to our church was on condition that she make a showing at the ‘Hour of Power’ on the Sunday night.

 Halfway through the prayer meeting, Joan Gieson made her entrance with her entourage and was introduced. She spoke for a few minutes and said she had been all over the world and had never been to a church where there were so many men. As I sat in my seat I thought “and my men are not even here to be numbered among those she was counting”. My husband and little boy had gone to collect my two teenaged sons who had spent the weekend at camp.

 That night when I got home I told my boys I wanted them to go to the healing and deliverance services with me. They said “you know is church all weekend we had, we want to play football”. I understood what they meant.

 Monday I wanted to be at the church early. I went to the boys and asked them if they were coming. They did not answer. I knew they were not coming. My little boy wanted to stay home and play so I told him I’d take him tomorrow. My husband did not remember the services. I left without them.

 As I went in the car, I said “Lord, if you heal me tonight my boys will not be there, but it’s OK”. As I arrived at church I thought what if someone asked me why I was so early (since I was an hour and a quarter early), I would answer “ If I knew there would be food here and I was hungry, wouldn’t I be early”. 

As I went into the empty church, three other people went ahead of me. I knew them so I went to say ‘hello’. The gentleman, John, whom I knew from my childhood enquired about my nursing and I told him I didn’t work anymore because of my back. He said “well, you know what, you’re in the right place”.

 As I took my seat, an old nurse sat beside me and we were talking and laughing. She enquired what I was doing and I told her of my back. Suddenly while talking she said to me “I must move away from you” and moved one seat away and we both kept quiet. In that time before the service began I spoke with the Lord: “Lord don’t let me see a white lady or people with blond hair tonight. Help me to see you”.

 As the song service / worship began, the church began to fill up. Suddenly I saw Lawrence, my eldest son, come and stand beside me. My tears just poured as I told him “thank you for coming”. He said: “Lyndon (my second son) is outside and Terry (little son) and Daddy are coming”. As my second son walks in and stands on my other side, I realize the Holy Spirit left the seats next to me vacant for them. I could not hold back the tears.

 The service was handed over to Joan Gieson and she started calling out conditions of deafness and blindness and she said “there’s one who’s been in an accident with a partial paralysis”. I said in my heart: “Lord, she’s not saying it right. I’m not paralysed” (not remembering the day I couldn’t move).

 She takes some time with the deaf people and they are miraculously healed. Then she calls for the one who’d been in the car accident and hurt the back. I said “Lord, she’s saying it right this time” and quickly put my hand up to be seen. I was escorted by one of the workers to the platform where I was prayed for, stretched over the dear lady’s back and then made to do what I couldn’t do before. I thought “it was not about what I couldn’t do, since I could do everything but just with pain”. I decided to try straight leg raises since I couldn’t do that without extreme pain. At first it was painful and the lady prayed “no more pain” and encouraged me to do it again and again. I now felt a new pain not the one I was accustomed to. I was feeling pain in the bundle of muscles at the front of my leg. The lady commented that it was because I had not used those muscles for a long time. I was making a full 90 degree angle without the nerve pain. Before a packed church, the Lord had performed a miracle of healing to my body. After that everything was a bit dazed to me. I really did not hear or remember what was said and only know because I got the tapes of the service afterwards.

 Mrs. Gieson started her message then focuses on me again and calls out my husband and children. She had me run and then insisted I give my husband a kiss. The expressions of my 9 year old boy, Terrence, of being ‘very happy and overjoyed’ at my healing because he was not able to play with his mommy for any long periods only on the bed, brought tears to everyone’s eyes and dispels any doubts of the healing in the congregation’s eyes, since they might have seen me around and ‘looking well’, not knowing what I’d been going through..

 On 26^th August 2002 I not only received one miracle of physical healing but five miracles. The first was my children being present for the service. The second was the physical healing. The third was the marriage (that’s what the kiss was about). The fourth was the work the Lord was doing in the children’s lives. The fifth was a boldness I received to declare the gospel.

 I have experienced pain and the human effort to make me better. I have experienced the miraculous touch of our Lord Jesus, The Great Physician, The Mighty healer and there is no comparison to be made. Put your trust in the Lord. He is the sure Healer. We just have to WAIT ON THE LORD.

                                                                                                         Bernadette Lai Tan

                                                                                                        30^th August 2002

 Love you,

Bernadette (Trinidad)